Exhaustion
And now that I've had an anonymous poster say that, "u really need to update this bad-boy", here I am. Who knew it was that easy? Just needed an anonymous comment... kidding.
Anyhow, back to the main point. Yes, I suck. And when I say I've been busy, I wish there were some easy to understand sliding scale displaying just how busy I've been. Let's just say that sleep is my long lost friend, who's been on a long trip to Antarctica. And if I'm lucky, their plane gets back sometime this weekend, and I'll be able to "catch up". Is it as bad as it sounds? Yeah, and possibly worse.
Needless to say, I honestly feel like a shell of my former self. There are times that I do something innocuous, like kneel on the floor to pick up some of my son's toys, and the thought crosses my mind to just lie down right there & pass out. Now granted, this has lessened a lot in the last week. I'm now getting some more sleep, but still not enough. With luck, this holiday weekend will help all of that. I hope.
Anyhow, to give you all a brief update on my activities for the last 2 1/2 months, and items of note:
- I took on a huge consulting web project, that in many ways appeared to be something that could inevitably help launch me on the path of working for myself full-time.
- I went on a vacation to visit my family in Upstate NY, but it ended up being a working vacation. And didn't very well resemble a vacation due to the family drama that was bound to ensue.
- Add the two items above, and I didn't get nearly the relaxation that I needed.
- While on vacation, I was offered & accepted a new full-time job that was too good to pass up, but only after having to deal with a neurotic recruiter.
- I started working part-time for the new job during the second week of my two-week notice.
- Then I started full-time with the new job.
- I still had some things to finish up on the old job, because I care about the people, and my integrity is important to me.
- The web project was still on-going.
- Another consulting project that had been in a hold pattern for a bit, ramped up again, on top of all of the other things. But the money was seriously worth it.
- The new job's requirements for programming are immense, fun & challenging. I'm loving it more than I can say... if it weren't for the stuff that I'm still trying to wrap up.
- The web project is still going, but given a bit of luck, I'll be done by the end of next week, and I can't wait to wash my hands of the whole thing.
- I've learned more about myself & how I want to operate my consulting than I have in the last 6 years of my consulting.
- K & I were pregnant.
- K & I miscarried.
- I'm worried about K's health above all else.
- K & I will find a way to move on, and still have the family that we want. After some healing.
- I've never been more tired in my memorable life than in the last 6 weeks.
- I want to stop & smell the roses once in a while.
- I want to stop & sleep once in a while.
- I want to figure out my life, and not feel so lost all of the time.
- I want to write more, among other things, to serve as a way to disconnect from my "job".
So much for a short list of items. And that's just a brief glimpse in my life.
This post is also rather innocuous in the grand scheme of things, and where my head is at. But I'll get to the more juicy stuff. I have to. It's been needing to get out. And I've had several posts swimming in my head, while I've written this one.
Stay tuned, and thank you dear readers, all 6 of you, for hanging in there during my absense.
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