Sexually Me

So, I've been toying with the idea of writing a guest post for Ben for a while now. I actually started one, and then deleted half of it and started over, and then I got hit with some writers' block. It's still sitting, half-written on my laptop. But then Mark posted, questioning why more wives don't talk about the issues inherent in being married to a bisexual man, and whether he intended it or not, I felt like it was a kick in the ass. So while I obviously can't speak for everyone, I can at least share why I will blog about my kid and my friends and the fun parts of my relationship with my husband, but I won't blog about this. For one, if I talk about it, it means admitting that this is not something that will go away. Obviously, I know that it's not going away, whether I talk about it or not. But putting it out there for everyone to see, so that everyone knows about my private pains, makes it somehow more real. It means that for the time I spend com

For those of you that haven't seen this touching story as yet, here's a link to Mark's post about it. The circumstances surrounding the event are magical, and truly inspirational. And it's close to my hometown. So it has a more personal aspect for me. So I started thinking about the lives we lead, and as I could feel the tears come to my eyes, I realized that I once had a moment that was similar. I was 11 or 12. I can't remember the year exactly, but the moment itself is permanently etched into my synapses. I was playing baseball during the summer in the town league. It was my 2nd year with this team, after a miserable previous year under a coach that was as clueless as he was unfair. So my view of baseball had been shaded. (One of the few times that's it's happened in my life.) We had been blessed by the league & by the many irritated parents to get a coach that still influences me & who I am. As well as how I play ball. He was a renowne

Just a quick post to let you all know that as of this evening's post, I have upgraded from the standard blogger comments to HaloScan. It ultimately will give me more control over how they display, along with some other cool features that I've been wanting to muddle with. So never fear. The comments that you had in previous posts are not gone, but just need to be linked back in... which I will be doing slowly in the coming days. But feel free to add a new comment at any time. Cheers!

With the idea in mind of posting more, and divulging more of my varied & eccentric past, I'm going to take a detour into the past. Quite a ways back in fact, to probably one of the most fucked up experiences that I've gone through. Let's warp back to my third year of high school as a Junior. I was newly 17, and sick & tired of not having a girlfriend up to this point in my life. I'd never experienced any kind of lengthy physical contact much less a kiss. And let's face it. I was 17, and ready to jump anything that moved... or stayed still for that matter. Irregardless, I did have standards, and I desperately wanted to shake off the "nerd" stereotype that I was labeled with throughout my academic career. (I thoroughly shook off that label once in college, but that's another post of hilarity.) Now, for perspective, my high school was small. When I mean small, I mean that the entire building would probably fit inside a Super Target, or a d

Showered Affection Originally uploaded by Ben aka "lightnyn" . For all of my devoted fans, readers... you people. I know that the thought of me sudsing up sent several of you into a "lather". So this is for those of you that would like to "foam" at the mouth. Once again, another great photo from my favorite photographer. Although, she didn't get the detail that I'm sure all of you would have preferred. Just remember that you need to pay the big dollars for that. After all, I'm not cheap... at least not regularly. Regardless, I "wash my hands" of the process since I'm merely the subject. HHNT!

My Head Hurts Originally uploaded by Ben aka "lightnyn" . Okay, it didn't really hurt, but it seemed like a suitable caption. And now for my apology... My dear friends, I'm sorry that I've neglected you to such ginormous proportions. I've been busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest, and frazzled to the bone. Whenever I've been on my laptop, it's entailed deep involvement in a myriad of projects or staring blankly at the screen, trying to remember where I left my carton of cupcakes. Needless to say, it hasn't been intentional, just an oversight due to an almost overwhelming volume of tasks. However, I've started counseling, and it just changed to every week, so I expect to have tons of material that will be dredged out of my forgotten past & damaged psyche. So please stay tuned, as the insanity will continue, if not intensify. Take care!