Sexually Me

Right Arm & Shoulder Originally uploaded by lightnyn . Oh my goodness! I'm doing on the right day. Something must be wrong with me. :) Another photo that I can be proud of due to the definition that I have in my shoulders. Although, if I were to get a little bit more in shape, some of those muscle lines would really highlight themselves. Please let me know what you think, and Happy HNT!

B&W Boxer Briefs Originally uploaded by lightnyn . So, yes, once again, a day late. And while I think this photo leaves much to be desired (where's the artistic touch?), I'm sure some of you will enjoy it. Regardless, I apologize for being late to the HNT game, but at least I'm here. (I've had lots going on, and plenty to post about. Stay tuned.)

Vertical Leg Originally uploaded by lightnyn . Hey Gang! I wanted to let you all know that I'm sorry for having missed HNT last week. Things got away from me, including sleep, so it wasn't until Friday that I even noticed that I missed it. As penance for this greivous offense, I thought I would post my HNT early for your viewing pleasure. It's also that we're heading out of town today for our Disneyland adventure, sans 2-year-old, and very much looking forward to enjoying ourselves. Have a great weekend & Thanksgiving! Eat a slice of turkey for me, and in another week, I'll provide a more intriguing photo for HNT. P.S. I know that this photo is a bit dark, and I apologize for that. Since my computer has been on the fritz, getting large apps to run has been a challenge, and both of my image editing programs fall into that category. Christmas will hopefully bring a new laptop. Cheers!

The New Monogamy - Marriage With Benefits During my (late) lunch, I just read this article that I had printed earlier today. I think the original link came from Viviane's Sex Carnival . Regardless, I have to say that it was extremely interesting. I liked how the article, by two traditional monogamists, looked at all aspects of alternative lifestyles. They focus on the good & the bad. They give examples of those that succeed, as well as those that failed. And I'm just intrigued. I have a cousin who is about 10 years my senior, but I haven't talked to him since the one summer during high school. I was visiting for about 4 weeks, which was fun to get out of my hometown for a bit. During my time there, I was a bit amazed at some of the things he talked about, and a willing & eager sponge for knowledge. Let's be honest. I think I was 15 or 16, and a boiling mass of hormones. Anyway, he had this theory that everyone should have: a therapist, a sex counselor, ...

Yep. My heart broke last night. I was helpless. My wife & son are currently back in New Jersey because K's grandmother fell last week and cracked her hip. Now, understand that it's not broken. Just cracked. And since she's almost 80, there isn't much to be done other than prescribing pain killers & plenty of bed rest. Or rest in general. And since my wife is newly without a full or part-time job (good thing), she is the most mobile person of the family to go help. So on Thursday, we made arrangements for her to fly out with the on Saturday with the LD in tow. I helped plan the packing, and help her get stuff together to head out. Well, things have been good, because her uncle has also been there helping Grandma. However, being a Bostonian, the commute over the last month since the death of the other uncle has been taking it's toll. He's exhausted (who wouldn't be), and hence why the phone call to K asking for help. Well, yesterday coincided...

Alright... well, I'm slightly pissed. I spent tons of time on Friday, which I'll admit was quite fun, messing around with the styles in my blog to make that really cool effect around my photos. Only to find tonight, that it looks great in Internet Exploder, but like total crap in Firefox. So now, I need to go back to the drawing board to figure out what went wrong. [For those of you that use Firefox exclusively, I had made the effect around a photo to be a kinda wide grey border (working), with a slightly thinner black border surrounding the grey. Like my own special matting done on framed photos. But, as you can see, it's doing the grey perfectly, and the black is... well, smooshed. *sigh* If anyone has an idea on how to fix this, I'm all ears.] Never fear, I'll resolve this soon. I hope.

MAIM Screenshot Originally uploaded by lightnyn . As I was organizing my web buttons & photos in Flickr today, I happened to see this amalgamation . What can I say? I'm easily amused.

Left Hand & Cell Phone Originally uploaded by lightnyn . Not terribly exciting, but one of the things that my wife simply loves about me. As you can sort of tell, my hands are rough & dry. K says she likes the texture as they rub across her skin, and the way that they seem like hard-working hands. I think she just has a "cowboy" fetish that she hasn't told me about yet. In some ways, I admit to being a bit of a cowboy since I have a natural slightly "bow legged" look, and I'm saving to get some boots. So, in that vein... howdy!

http://wbloggar.com Last week, when I was researching some Blogger hacks, I found this software. Like all new software that I check out, I'm always skeptical. That's mostly because I refer to myself as an "interface whore". I want my software to not only run well, but to make my experience using it intuitive... even *gasp* fun. I'm glad to say that after only using this for 2 days, I think it's incredible. Mostly, I just love the large screen in which to modify my template, and the way that it color codes the HTML for me. You can even save posts that you're working on locally to .POST files. Sure, it's not a "draft" on the web to be edited from anywhere, but I'm willing to bet that most of us use only one computer for most of our posts, in rare circumstances, maybe two *raising hand*. But a very useful feature if you can't rely on the internet connection to stay alive. It also has the ability to store multiple "profiles...

Right Arm Originally uploaded by lightnyn . I know that this is late for Thursday, but I should be in just under the wire. I wasn't able to get photos done prior to this evening due to a crazy schedule. Anyhow, my arms are the one feature that I like the most, particularly my right. That's my throwing arm, and I'm proud of my ability to throw someone out with [Cartman voice over] authorita!

P.M. Dawn - I'd Die Without You I'm not sure how varied your music tastes are, but mine cover a lot of ground. Sort of. Anyhow, I've had this CD for years, after I heard this group in high school. And something about this song is hypnotic and evocative. In college, I'd put this song and Looking Through Patient Eyes (same album) on repeat in my dorm room, turn it low and let it play while I slept. Sure, I was depressed at times, and sometimes it was just comforting. Like a lover stroking your back, or running their fingers through your hair. So I bring this up because I'm listening to my LAUNCHcast station, and this comes on. Maybe it's all that I've been reading lately and feeling connected to many of you & your lives, or it's just that things are tough right now. But I'd love to just go home, curl up in bed, and cry myself to sleep. I have so much going on with consulting, work, and feeling a bit disconnected from my wife (she's been fi...

Gizoogle - Textilizer Another utility that is just too funny to not mention. Particularly for those of us (me) that lack "street cred". Enjoy.

A Course In Wife Sciences OMG. Why didn't I get this sooner? Why couldn't this have been given to me when I turned 18, along with signing my draft card, and getting that spiffy razor from Gillette. I think I'll laminate & store this for my son. After all, he'll need it. [Credit to K for making my life so fucking simple.] (I wanted to make sure that this statement isn't taken out of context. It's meant to be indicative of sarcasm because she really is truly magnificent, if not a bit snarky at times. But that's part of her charm.) Excerpt from IM: Lightning: And now my life sucks. *sigh* K: Your life doesn't suck. You're married to a fabulous woman who loves you to distraction. I would say you're in good shape. Lightning: Oh... right. Answer B. Duh.

After a serious post today, I thought it would be fun to provide something a bit more light. Well, from my perspective at least. This may be presumptuous, but once word spreads about the incredibly personal & touching things I have to share about my life, I know that fans will arrive in droves. And once here, I'm sure they'll rave about the fun little additions that I've made to my Blogger template. Particularly the dynamic link lists provided by Spurl , and the nifty Online Status Indicator icons for my instant messaging. Alright. Seriously. I think I better return to reality before I get light-headed. What I'm getting at is that I found these cool little tweaks because I believe strongly in providing valuable information to those that want it, and I hate having to do anything manually that can be done with something that's smarter than I am. Namely, all those servers sitting in ether-space holding this blog, and the services that I subscribe to. So, to ...

Grey's Anatomy I'm not sure how much any of you tune in to TV, but we were fortunate enough to start watching since the premiere. On top of being smart, fast-paced & comedically well timed, it's just fun. While it has some of the intense drama-esque scenes that ER was so fond of (and jumped the shark with), it also just makes me laugh. It makes me feel like every place of business should have that kind of personal interaction & humor. On top of feeling like I'm coming down with something so that I can have "Izzy" check me out, it makes me reflect on my life just a bit... but in a good way. [This could become a huge post, so I think I'll just start this off with some history of the past few weeks, and I'll continue it as we go along.] So anyhow, those of you that were able to tune in this past Sunday, know that it was a tough show. And in light of my recent family events, it really brought home how special & tenuous our lives are. I've...

If you haven't figured it out already, I'm a computer geek. I like to tweak, twist & nibble... on... um... well, you get the picture, on sites & technology. I'm sure you've already seen some changes & adjustments, and you can be assured that there will be more. And even more "honesty" awaits as well. After having some great chats this weekend on IM & e-mail, I have these fresh thoughts that I need to get out of my head. Have a Happy Halloween, and I'll talk to you soon.

Googlism Okay... this is just way too funny to not post about it. Especially for a Monday morning. Enter your first name, and have a laugh at some of the results. My favorites after a brief scan are: ben is ejaculating on the hot opened vagina of a prostitute with a big sexy tits ben is holding teresa's head and inserting his dick into her wet mouth ben is also in april's seventeen magazine ben is coming ben is inserting his horny erected cock into the widely opened asshole of his mature lover ben is my longdurationsavior So yeah, I'm predictable. But what else would you expect from a perv? Have a great Monday!

Three posts in one day. No, I'm not trying to set a record. Just trying to start poring out some of my emotion because I'm not sure how much longer I can keep it bottled up. So, I've been feeling weepy lately... over the last few days. I can blame part of it on the eloquent prose from Jefferson at " One Life, Take Two ". Another part of it is the relief at finally having my wife back in town, after her hasty departure two Mondays ago to deal with the loss of her Uncle in New Jersey (45 minutes from Manhattan). Another, and probably bigger part is realizing that life is fleeting, and that deep down, I'm not happy. Ask my wife, and she'll tell you that I haven't been happy for a while. Sure, I have my moments, that I couldn't be happier than in that moment. Then life rushes in, and I'm back to just maintaining. I could start going into all of my issues, but I'd need a week to write this. Much of it is the job loss over the last year...

I ask you to bear with me as I start to adjust how this space is organized. As a computer nerd at heart, I like to tinker, tweak & utterly transform my creations. And this, more than anything of late, could be considered a creation like none other. So, soon, you'll be graced with: a photo for my profile, additional links from which inspiration is derived, sites of pleasure, maybe even Half-Nekkid Thursday pictures. Please bear with me, and your comments are always welcome.

Welcome to my little portion of the web. At least the one that will highlight this "secretive" part of my self. In the everyday world, I'm a successful(?) computer programmer, consultant, father, and husband to a loving & supportive wife. Some would say that I've come far from whence I began, and they might even consider that I have little to wish for. And then there's the battle that I wage almost daily within my own psyche. Most recently in the last year, I've undergone a shift of jobs not once, but four times. Included in that, is a gap of two months without ful-time employment. Add to that, a sudden death of an uncle-in-law, and I'm trying to find a way to not only live my life with more clarity, but with happiness. And in the last 2 weeks, I'm grasping for straws. I've been curious, yearning, to experience the sexual aspects of a man, and to really embrace the more submissive side of my sexual identity. At the same time, I'm sca...